Cherries, Trampolines and Thinking

Thinking about thinking to be more exact. But first– a week in the life of emotional intelligence and road schooling.

If emotional intelligence were a fruit, it might be a cherry. Sweet, sometimes tart, and ready for picking if you know where to look and have the right tools to do so. And lucky us—we looked up from our math books this week and spotted an entire cherry tree bursting with possibility.

Yes, roadschooling has its rhythms. Morning lessons rolled smoothly into spontaneous harvesting, and before I could say “lesson plan,” the kids were pitting cherries and dragging a relatively old juicer out of the basement like tiny farm alchemists. Fresh cherry juice? Check. Hands-on science, teamwork, motor skills, and joy? Double check.

But cherries weren’t the only thing popping off this week.

They’ve been busy building a trampoline (because yes, sometimes we bounce through "recess"), playing with baby kittens (finally old enough to socialize—cue nonstop squealing), swimming, watering the vegetable bed like proud little garden gnomes, and curling up with books like seasoned pros of the chill and read lifestyle. And let’s not forget the highlight: horseback rides through the arena and nearby forest. Wrapping up these final days has been bittersweet, but Denmark is calling and our wheels will soon be rolling north.

Now, about those cherries and trampolines...

One of my favorite things about our days isn’t just the wild range of activities and sudden urgency to start some random project—it’s how full they are of emotional intelligence in action. Like when one kid got frustrated during juicing (because cherries are, apparently, not very cooperative), and the other offered, “Do you want a break while I take over?” That’s empathy, folks. The ability to notice, reflect, and respond with heart. Not bad for a Tuesday before lunch.

And this got me thinking—well, more like thinking about thinking—which, it turns out, is called metacognition. And let me tell you, it’s everywhere in my world right now.

I’m neck-deep in resilience research (again—because I can’t stop won’t stop). I’m working on a new course for parents and reading four books simultaneously, each from a different angle:

📘 Conflict Resilience

📙 The Let Them Theory

📗 The Source

📕 Emotional Intelligence 2.0

Different authors, different tones, but all mention something super important to resilience: metacognition.

Thinking about thinking. Noticing your thoughts as thoughts, instead of being hijacked by them. Charting your reactions to things that trigger you. Naming feelings as they come up. Reflecting before reacting. Slowing down just long enough to ask, “Why am I doing what I’m doing?” or “Is this feeling mine, or am I just mirroring someone else's?” Or, my go-to first step, just slowing things down, taking a deep breath before responding and being more and more ok with silence.

It’s crucial not just for parenting, but for conflict resolution, personal growth, and developing emotional intelligence in our kids (and ourselves). In fact, I’m starting to believe that metacognition might be one of the most important life skills we can pass on. Along with all other emotional intelligence skills. And breathwork. Ok, so there's a few things that might be important life skills to pass on...

So, the next time you feel overwhelmed, irritated, or emotionally hijacked—pause and label it. Just say,“I’m noticing I feel [emotion] and I’m having the thought that [thought].”

That small act of stepping outside the swirl is metacognition in action. It’s not about stopping the emotion—it’s about observing it instead of becoming it. Like a kid watching the cherries fall into the juicer. Curiously. Patiently. With sticky fingers and a wide open heart.

Because the goal isn’t to be perfect—it’s to become aware.

And maybe juice a little joy along the way.

Which the kids then made into ice cream! Yeah, after harvesting cherries by the buckets a couple of them realized they don't like cherry juice. So they made it into ice cream. Flexibility. Going with the flow. Changing plans as we go.

Amazing day on a lake for a birthday celebration, and yes my daughter is wearing cow boy boots for some reason...

Like for our sons birthday. A couple random things had to be adjusted and changed in the moment but we still had a blast canoeing and picnicking with family and friends. Really, just leading up to it I was a little too busy. Remember, I was busy with a to-do list a mile long, lots of stressful appointments and then planning a birthday on top of all that? Well, the birthday is behind us, almost all appointments taken care of and the to-do list... well, it's still a mile long but I'm learning to be compassionate with myself and grateful for what I have been able to accomplish.

Now to get back to packing- and be on our way!